The Last Ditch by Tom Paine

Yesterday, three men attacked the sole security guard outside the door of a jewellery store in a small county town in the North of England. Normally there are two guards, but one was on his lunch break. Evidently the store and the habits of its guards were under observation. A robber threatened the guard with something, errm, I think it’s called "a gun." You know; one of those terribly useful things honest citizens are not allowed to have in England. The robbers jammed open the security door. As the staff looked on, they smashed the display cabinets with crowbars and stole the contents. Then they escaped.

Mrs Paine heard this story repeatedly today as she was shopping (we are visiting our home town to spend time with the younger Miss Paine who has the weekend off from school). When my wife dropped into the jewellers to pick up a repaired item, she mentioned that everyone in town was talking about the robbery. The staff confirmed what she had heard, but were apparently under instructions not to talk about it; presumably so as not to alarm the customers.

The incident happened at 3pm yesterday. Shortly afterwards, the streets were awash with armed response police officers carrying automatic weapons (you know; more of those things forbidden to defenceless citizens, but freely available to criminals). They made a big and utterly pointless show of force. The populace was unimpressed.

We know the staff concerned quite well and feel for them. Clearly this was a scary experience. Mrs P. reports that person after person offered unsolicited opinions about the uselessness of the current government; bemoaning the way it has been soft on crime and even more on the causes of crime (aka criminals). All mention of the government’s statistics showing crime to be down was greeted with derisive snorts.

I sense the mood is finally changing even here, in Labour’s heartlands. The people have finally had enough of these useless losers, their lies and their endless distractions from the real business of government. I only wish the manner of their going could be as terrifying for them as yesterday’s incident was for the staff of that store.